18 years ago

As I sit here writing out my oldest child's birthday card, I think back to when she was still inside of me and I was about to become a mother for the first time...Let's see, Amanda.

• Bill Clinton was running for President of the United States.
• The best songs on the radio were Tears in Heaven, by post-druggie Eric Clapton and I Will Always Love You, by pre-druggie Whitney Houston.
• Arthur Ash announced that he had AIDS
• Rodney King happened
• We were one year out of a very fast war against Saddam Hussein and troop morale was high
• Disney's Aladdin was the newest hit movie, along with The Bodyguard, Wayne's World, and Sister Act.
• Depo-Provera was approved as a safe contraceptive in the USA (HA - what a joke)

I was married to Billy, my long time high school friend. I lived in Virginia and he was in Germany, living the army life. We had lived in Germany together long enough for me to get pregnant. We were actually in the process of divorcing when I found out that I was pregnant. He didn't even believe that I was until I dragged him to the ultrasound when I was 22 weeks along. We decided to try to stay together. He was in Germany when you were born, but I videotaped the birth and his mother and my mother were in the room with me. They were so excited to become first time grandmas. I was just overwhelmed and wanted you to come out. My cousin Dawn (more like a sister to me) had just had her son 3 days before you were born. I went into labor driving her and her son home from the hospital. Labor with you was stop and go so my doctor decided to induce you, so she could deliver you before having to leave town. Your due date was October 23rd. You were born on October 15th, your great-grandma Brown's birthday. She was able to hear your cry over the phone in the delivery room. Aunt Margaret was on grandma's end of the phone too. Margaret said she had never seen her mom so happy. Your great-grandma Brown is looking at you from Heaven, sweetie. Tears in Heaven. I Will Always Love You.

beginning anew

So, I have been thinking a lot lately of starting the whole blog thing again. Its a virtual diary after all, and I miss diary writing. This time I'm going to attach it to CWD. I've never attached a blog to a forum before. There will be lots of soul searching, taking inventory of my life, my children, my career, my future..... lots of poetry, I tend to work through emotional blocks that way. I also tend to take stock of diabetes through writing. So here we go..... lets begin.